The mammogram

I have done lots of tests to prepare for the transplant.  Most are just no big deal, drawing blood, hooking up heart monitors, etc.  Of course, I had to finally get a mammogram yesterday.  When I turned 40 (7 years ago), my doctor and I discussed the mammogram idea.  Since I didn't have a history of breast cancer, and since I regularly checked myself out, we/I decided that we wouldn't discuss it again until I was 45.  At that point, we brought it up again, and I told the doctor that I would do it when I was 46.  I changed doctors in the mean time, and didn't do it.  But now to prepare for the transplant I had to do it.  When I was in there, the lady asked me how I got to 47 without ever having gone to get one.  I responded that I was thrilled I got that far without getting "caught." 

I had heard all sorts of rumors and read all sorts of fun stories about a mammogram.  Not being very well endowed, I couldn't envision what it would even be like.  There isn't anything on my anatomy large enough to place under the car tire.  Little did I know that the nurse would be pulling all the skin on my chest to make it spread out onto a plate and then placing another plate on top to squish it out.  AND not gently.  What the heck?!  Four times!  My guess is that it must hurt a lot for women who have much more "skin" on their chest.  Wowzee, ouch.  I would way rather have a pap smear than a mammogram.  Anyday.

I had a CT scan so the doctors could figure out which kidney they were going to take.  They inject you with a dye.  The injection only lasts about 10 seconds.  And by the way, where does it go after the 10 seconds?  I have no idea.  Anyway, you can feel the injection spread quickly through your body.  When it reaches your privates, they get super hot and it feels like you wet your pants.  Haha.  What a weird feeling.  Luckily they warned me that would happen.  It nearly made me laugh, which would have ruined the CT scan.  Anyway, my left kidney is the one that is up for grabs.

They found an issue with my EKG, so they may do an Echo.  I love all this free health care I am getting.  I hope in the end my health is good enough to donate.  However, if it isn't, at least I know exactly what is wrong with me.  I hope I don't have breast cancer.