From Dearest of Friends

I received this October 14, 2017 (2 weeks after Paul died).  Everyone should have friends that bless them like this at all times  Be that friend.  I will strive to be a better friend.  Sometimes I cry when I read it.  I am particularly touched by the reality of my new access to Deity. 

Oh, hon, you have been in our thoughts constantly since leaving the funeral and traveling back to Phoenix.  This is a "one set of footprints in the sand" kind of time, and we know from personal life experiences, our testimony that you and the Savior are having a very special walk right now.  We know He is carrying you, PerriAnn! This is a bittersweet time, most bitter because of your separation from your beloved eternal companion, and yes, sweet beyond measure because the dear Lord is cradling you in his very arms.  As daughters of God in a covenant marriage relationship we approach our Father's throne together with the patriarch and priesthood holder of our family. With this line of authority now temporarily held in abeyance and suspended here in mortality, you now have direct access to Deity.  PerriAnn, no one has Jesus Christ's heart as do the widows and the fatherless!  He loves you!  He will lift your burdens!  He will comfort you!  He will intercede with the Father on your behalf!

How we have missed you!  Looking back on past years now gone forever, we want to apologize for letting our friendship drift, for want of our staying in touch.  We had no idea, the fault being our own, of the extent to which you and Paul were agonizing.  As the true friends we would wish to be, we should have made ourselves aware and been there for both of you!  Not being ones to complain, in spite of unbelievable burdens that would have broken anyone else, you carried on, and now the blessings we might have claimed by staying closer...have gone to others.  We have been taught a great life lesson!  Forgive us! 

PerriAnn, as we have reflected upon you and upon what a perfect help-meet you were to our husband, the one word that keeps coming back and back to us is "Respect."  We want you to know that you have our undying admiration and respect for all you are and for all you have done and accomplished these many years since we have known you.  When we think of how you started out, a young woman taking on a new husband, a new marriage, and the social relationships and ramifications that went with it, five very needy and young children, your two own precious darlings to rescue and bring home with overwhelming odds against you...who can help but be awed by you and the hand of God in your lives??  No one knows better than we, all the emotional baggage that accompanies burying a first spouse.  PerriAnn, though we know but the tip of the iceberg, we have seen you endure horrendous, innumerable situations with patience and grace...that have made you saint in our book!  Seeing just a glimmer of your true greatness and how far the dear Lord has brought you at such a relatively young age we can only conclude that an equally miraculous future awaits you.  Your superior abilities, talents, intellect and wisdom have prepared you to continue building the Kingdom of God as a highly effective instrument in his hands and we believe that will happen!  Sweetheart, our roots with one another run deep and our memories of you and Paul are still sweet and fragrant.  Our love for you, Paul, and your children are woven into our very being!  You are among those with whom we want to spend eternity!  Going forward may the dear Lord help us to not repeat past mistakes but endeavor to remain close, supportive, and loving!  PerriAnn, you are everyone's treasure!  Paul chose wisely!  Henceforth, you will be known in our family as our very own "Baby PerriAnn," and we hereby bestow the honorary title of Bay PerriAnn upon you...along with A LIFETIME OF SPOILING!!  God bless and keep you our dearest, dearest girl, and all our love from your forever friends. 

Motivation

I actually pray when I get home to have energy to stay up and work on my bedroom.  I cannot seem to get it together to put away all of Paul's stuff.  I don't have a problem with my stuff.  Just trying to figure out what to do with the endless amounts of things that are too valuable to throw away, not quite valuable enough to sell, and saving for later when I might need to use them.  I have piles of this stuff.  Who knew it would be this hard?!